Should It Be this Hard?

April 25 2024

Some single guy sends a message: “Hi, how are you?” You are lying in bed on the weekend and, with nothing else demanding attention, you look at the photo and the profile. If she has any further curiousity we ask for the more interesting photos. If she is still interested we respond: “Can you meet at place X on day Y or Z?”

And this is where it all begins to fall apart-

-Guy 1 does not respond to anything over the next two weekends and then suddenly messages that he will be at X on the next day. A day that was never on offer.

=Guy 2 would love to but he needs to work in Brisbane for the next ten days. Our response: Let us know when you are back. Three weeks later, crickets.

-Guy 3 must be Guy 2's Siamese Twin because he has exactly the same excuse and is never heard from again.

-Guy 4 does actually turn up at the venue and on time. He is dressed like a sloppy 14 year old and spends his time slumped in the lounge chair fiddling with his keys. I get an early sign from the lucky woman who is meant to benefit from all this, and it is not good. Confirmed later as the slumping around and fiddling continues.

Years ago when a guy wanted me to fuck his wife, I turned up to the job interview well-dressed and carrying a bottle of champagne. I sat up straight and engaged with both of them until he told me to fuck his wife. That turned into regular encounters over the next 8 months, one of the highlights of my life.

Is it really too difficult to be bothered these days?


  • Obi1kenietzsche


    3 months ago

    Who the fuck brings his keys to a play date?

  • teamaj2


    3 months ago

    Seems like any other day in the life of online hook ups .

    It’s all about sorting the wheat from the chaff . Quality meet ups take time , patience and a bit of good old fashioned good luck .

    We did find events and parties a better easier option . Even if we didn’t play there , we often took the party back to our place .

    People that arrive to meet you that make no effort with how they look tell you quickly a lot about themselves . You can dodge that bullet very quickly . Of course it’s frustrating and a waste of your time .

    We used to find those that made no effort with a bit of getting to know us both chat prior meeting were time wasters and quickly disappeared.

    Good luck . Ax

  • MsSuperFoxy


    3 months ago


    Demands attention.
    Expects big returns.

    Ms Foxy 🥱

  • RachWandered


    3 months ago

    In my humble opinion…
    It’s a cultural problem connected to gender norms and roles.

    We dichotomise gender roles. The heteronormative standard for a woman is to be a hero mother, wife and family maker. Women that fall outside of this are “other” and they aren’t performing the gender standard. They’re deviate from the gender norm so we don’t expect to have to show respect like we would a mother or a feminine role we understand and accept.

    A hot wife is not performing to the wifely gendered standard but she’s desirable. She’s a fetishised sexual encounter requiring zero social niceties, respect or genuine interaction. She doesn’t conform to a gender role we understand ergo we don’t need to afford her respect or interact socially.

    A hot wife has hubby for her aftercare. She won’t be demanding, catch feels and so nothing is expected beyond their magnificent cock. Zero obligation even arranging to meet because this is a deviant sexual transaction that sits outside of expected social norms.

    I’m a “MILF” or “older woman”
    A discreet affair to kickstart a libido. Same thing. Guys turn up to bestow me with their cock.
    I’m objectified and fetishised and undeserving of social interaction. I’m not an intimate partner and deserving of honesty or communication or social interaction.

    I’ve actually had guys complain that they shouldn’t have to spend time chatting because they’re here for sex… poor them having to interact socially with women on dates when they just wanna fuck ….

    I get hurt all the time by callous, disrespectful behaviour that insults my intelligence.

    Why am I here?

    Because I’m a tough bitch and I refuse to conform to the gender standards that are prescribed for me when they don’t suit me. I know what is best for me.

    I’m choosing to live authentically and according to my values.

    I’ve met some beautiful people. And had some of the best sex of my life … it’s worth it.


  • NeoAndTrin


    3 months ago

    It does seem like a common theme. Maybe slot of the common guys get performance anxiety before the event now.

    But as a single male here previously it's not a one sided affair let me tell you.

    First couple I spoke to was getting along well at first and then he started to get overly aggressive in his direction of what he wanted me to do. I kept polite the whole time but long story short he lost his shit and blocked me. Wife/partner kept unblocking me to apologize but he would just keep blocking. Crazy person 1 dodged. This couple are still on RHP and have even checked out our profile.

    2nd couple had only done FFMs only and the female was wanting to try 2 males. Had great communication, even talked over the phone and disaster struck me as I got sciatica. Had to cancel our agreed day and was trying to reschedule but this time the female lost her shit at me because I couldn't make the original day. Crazy person 2 dodged.

    Lost complete interest in couples after that.

  • compressor


    3 months ago

    All you want is for them to be honest with their intentions. If I said I was going to meet you then that is what I would do. I see your in Melbourne. I get to Melbourne for work. Anyway hope things work out better for you

  • Sawadee


    3 months ago

    I have a single profile and because of a reckognisable profile in RL l have no choice not show my pic .. We had a couples profile a few years back looking for a suitable male for her.. First hook up was quite successful having met at a neutral location.. this guy was exactly what we were looking for , clean , mannered , well dressed and equipted.. a birthday present for her with a difference.. The 2nd was more complicated so we pulled the plug when Mrs S started to lose interest finally pulling out of our profile altogether although still reads the forums..
    Bottom line is , l have a single ( but attached ) profile without a pic and thrown amoung all these other dropkicks mentioned above.. So my chance of meeting someone here as a single profile is zilch and accept that these days lm here for the forums only...

  • nightingale8


    3 months ago

    Speaking of odd things men do, once went out on a date and said date stood outside the venue with his legs apart, hands on hips, swaying hips side to side impatiently as we chatted. Now that wasn’t the reason I didn’t take things further but that did hurry up my decision to exit

  • Ex007


    3 months ago

    If their message contains little effort expect there will be little effort in all that they do. Have standards and delete/ignore anything that doesn't make the cut.

  • Feelsgood


    3 months ago

    Kids these days...

  • Flirty2020


    3 months ago

    We believe that a lot of it comes down to a sense of “entitlement “ and that because this is perceived as a sex site, these males believe that they are guaranteed sex, for minimal effort on their part.

    Maybe they believe that all us women are desperate and sit around with our legs open (on this sex site) waiting for a cock and a fuck?

    I had a guy message me the other night around 5:15 pm asking what I was up to, I replied that I was still at the office. He replied that he wanted to meet up with me after work for a fuck. This was his first unsolicited message out of the blue.

    I replied about the very short notice and furthermore that I knew nothing about him and had not even seen his face photos. I also made mention that wanting / asking / demanding something at such short notice was, in my opinion, rather disrespectful and smacked of instant gratification for zero effort.

    I also made it clear that I like to get to know people a little better before deciding if things would go further (beyond the meeting for drinks stage).

    He of course did not like this, and instead insisted that as this is a sex site, we are all here for the same reasons and that is for sex, sex and more sex and that I must have sex with him that night (or leave RHP) ….. to me that smacks of entitlement.

    I know that a lot of males on here share the same beliefs as this chap (have received a lot of similar unsolicited messages like this over that years)

    The same happens at swingers clubs - these guys hang around in the shadows and grope you as you walk past and or put in zero effort when it comes to communication , engaging in an decent conversation and selling themselves. Sloppy & lazy. They pay their $100 entry fee and believe that entitles them to sex on demand.

    On the flip side of the coin, a huge percentage (way over 95% ) don’t actually turn up to the meet & greet (drinks) that they have initiated. Do they get cold feet? Did they never intend to meet in the first place ? Was it only about the fantasy of the chase / hunt and when reality dawns on them, that now we have agreed to meet them for drinks, that they chicken out ?

  • Flirty2020


    3 months ago

    A couple of days ago , an allegedly 40 year old Melbourne businessman contacted me (Mrs) thtough this site. The usual sweet talking chit chat.

    His profile photo ( which has since been removed by admin) had been “stolen” from the internet (239 other locations)

    When I asked him if the photo was recent abs where it was taken , her replied that it was taken a few days earlier in Flinders Lane Melbourne . Of course the tineye photo search indicated that it was taken in 2105 in New York and was of a famous actor. Of course the Melbourne businessman had edited out the face of the stolen photo and converted it to black & white.

    When exposed, he quickly blocked us.

    Today he had unblocked us and once again messaged, this time to say that my husband is an old 60 year old man and that my husband comes last as he is no doubt a cuck. Of course we are not a cuckold couple.

    So why did this make contact us in the first place ? And now that he has been exposed and cannot get his way, resorts to insults? We have reported him to admin , blocked him and screenshotted his profile for future reference.

    Seems to be a lot of such types on here

  • damunblocker


    3 months ago

    At this age, the ability to just move on is simple and worth it . If the other party can’t be courteous even just to say no thanks, It’s a straight block, life is too short to worry about press clippings and their none existing manners.

    It has to be more than sex, chat, have a drink , watch a movie, go on a drive, or walk the limbs etc ..

    Chemistry is thrown around yet so few understand the meaning … it enhances the sexual journey you are embarking on.

    My $2

  • OZnAsia


    3 months ago

    Yes, guys 1-4 are in the majority, but guy 5 is awesome and well worth our time looking.
    Thanks to every "guy 5" 🔥

  • Perthpassionpair


    2 months ago

    I couldn't agree more, we've had a similar problem, a few have turned up without showering as well.

  • TheMinx


    2 months ago

    I went to lunch to meet a potential play party friend, was a beautiful summer day I had dressed to impressed. (Plus nice restaurant).
    He rocked up on his old ten speed bike and a tracksuit-which wasn't even grey 🤣
    1st impressions lasting. Was a hard no from me.