M34
A Convenient List of Excuses
March 09 2024
1) Sorry, I totally forgot but my cat’s sister’s best friend is having her third wedding anniversary and they have asked me to cater for it. We’ll need to postpone.
2) I was sunbathing naked in a swamp and fell asleep. My penis got mauled by mosquitos and now resembles a noni fruit. Could we do another night perhaps?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️ This excuse can seriously backfire if she has a kink for noni shaped penises.
3) Hey I’m really sorry but my crazy uncle has escaped from our basement again and we need to go looking for him. It’s the third time it’s happened this month 🙄🙄 I’ll let you know when I’m next available.
4) It just occurred to me that I have a blood test tomorrow and I really need to study for it. Do you think we could reschedule?
5) With Mercury being in retrograde and Saturn moving into the house of Capricorn, now is definitely not the time for a Scorpio (insert your star sign) to be dating a Libra (insert their star sign). I’m sure you’ll agree.
6) My best friend from childhood just called. He said he’s made a huge mistake and needs some help. Something about digging a hole in the woods or something. I should be available next week if you still want to catch up?
7) I was chatting to my spirit guide in the astral realm last night and she told me it's probably not going to work out. I’m really sorry but best not to waste any more of each other’s time.
8) My best friend’s uncle’s wife’s sister’s step daughter’s best friend’s pet rock died a few days ago and the funeral is tomorrow. I’m sorry we are all very heartbroken. I’ll be in touch when I am finished with the grieving process.
If you’ve got any more to add in the comments please do.
I'd love to know the weakest excuse you’ve heard on here.
Comments
MsSuperFoxy
a year ago
I fell off a monkey bar and broke my arm.
(Insert eye roll)
Ms FoxyMsSuperFoxy
a year ago
I gave this excuse once.
I have an appointment with my deaf gynecologist.
Ms Foxy 🤭Andrea_Sydney
a year ago
Ha! That made me laugh! Well done with this list, I will keep it handy 😂
Yellowpenguins
a year ago
Many years ago a friend has to cancel a date as a bridge was being named in her grandfather's honour.
It sounded like a false reason but was 100 percent legitimate..he never did give her another chance. 🤷 So I guess add bridge naming to the list.RHP User
a year ago
Loved reason number 5 😂
Lostyanumber
a year ago
I'd love to but Mum's baking scones.
RHP User
a year ago
What about …. Sorry but my photos are actually 15 years old and I never had any intention of meeting you anyway as I’m married and socially inept.
AshAndPaul
a year ago
I got my pussy waxed and became unwell…this is something I have received.
Flirtydancer
a year ago
Legit got "I dislocated my shoulder" and then see they had a validation the next day 🙄
RHP User
a year ago
Hahahahaha they are all so silly but funnt
squirtingmilf1
a year ago
@Alexis The funnier thing is no matter what excuse someone comes up with, there will always be one that says “ Would you like me to come with you to your best friend’s, uncle’s wife’s, sister’s step daughter’s, best friend’s pet rock funeral with you as I’ve got nothing better to do?”
Now as if the excuse made up is just a little bit unbelievable….
The mere fact that the one being let down is so compassionate, and empathetic and kind makes matters harder OR you just found out totally unintentionally that they are completely mad and you will infact never ever contemplate to reschedule.… and that little voice inside your head says RUN!!Rodney_and_Nani
a year ago
I have to inspect my eyelids for pinholes.
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