For me, due to work/distance, it is inevitable. I have not yet come to the stage of living with someone, the least space I can relate to is having had flatmates in the past, including with the opposite sex (which are in my repressed memories lol). Even with a g/f or fwbs, the average time spent together has come about two weeks apart. So on the contrary, for a while, I would probably end up in the category of "not getting enough" of someone, if a closer situation eventuated.

But of course, practical life needs like work shifts, would likely get in the way. I know married couples who barely see each other, at least during the week, when alternating shift work has meant one is at home while the other is out, and vice versa. For my g/f and those I have spent time with as fwb (ie singles), they have been highly independant with a full and quite busy life of their own, so certainly not greatly needy of any particular time together.

I wouldn't be needy in any other regard, quite happily entertain myself with day to day craziness, but sexually, I would be glued to him. He will have to pry me off, and I'm not kidding. I doubt either one of us will have time to eat lol 😀

So long distance is not an option. I need him to be um available? 😊 Actually fifo might work within an open relationship but not an interstate bf, couldn't do that. Short term longing I could almost manage. Great topic btw

It’s a never ending frontier of stories that help People to connect.....

The simplest is in the question “how was your day?”

- Posted from rhpmobile

RE. Married couples apart. A good friend of mine has spent her whole life with large chunks of time away from her husband due to work commitments. They have the best sex life out of all of my friends who have all been with long term partners. Maybe just lucky but I also know they put a lot of effort into connecting when they are away from each other and also when he is home. Also high levels of trust in each other. Of course sex isn't everything but its nice to see someone with the spark till strong after 20+ years.

Yes this can be the tricky part. I try to be honest about my need for space from the get go and if we are not on the same page at least they know what I'm about. Many people take it as a personal rejection when its not.

Yes travelling alone is a goal for me right now. I've never done it before. I'm going to start small with an overnight hike and camping by myself.

Love it. I need to do this more.

I love people and interacting with them and am very social but this has to be balanced by time alone.

Sometimes the married couples have said that they are successful because of the fact they don't see each other as often :) :p

- Posted from rhpmobile

My mission was accomplished then ;)

- Posted from rhpmobile

Yes. Actually, in the solo polyamorous dating game, that's basically a case of "winning by losing"...

although I don't currently want live in with a relationship, I'm not closed off to it in the future and would be turned off by that wall so to speak

to expand on that, I have been turned off and retreated many times with men over 40 who appear to be set in their ways

Morocco is amazing, very cheap and awesome views, most of the country can be seen by train. The food is unreal and you would love shopping in the medinas..you can go right down south into the Sahara and spend time chilling in a cheap but nicely located and quiet hotel with a pool. Its a worth while experience...then on your return to Aussie stop in Dubai for a few days.

Is it set in their ways or just understanding what they want though? Do people just get sick of compromising?

... and so the sociologists / psychologists declared.

We are at the dawn of a new era though, whereby relationships of codependancies and marriages that were entered into for the sake of being coupled up and establishing a family are quickly losing their appeal. Both gender are reeling from nasty breakups and divorces and the ability for both men and women to live independantly and survive is also enabling and empowering a lot of folks to embrace alone-ness and solitude.

I do need a lot of alone time to "recharge my batteries". Having to deal with all sorts of characters in my job wears me down and depletes my energy. I'm pretty much an extroverted introvert but recently, I learnt a new concept that might explain why constantly being with people just puts me on edge and makes me feel ill - I'm also an Empath! Yet another new terminology that might be applicable is this - Highly Sensitive Person, although I've got a tough shell like an armadillo and I can be a porcupine if the need arises! LOL!!! Maybe I'm the evolved non-victim style of an HSP!


I have discovered though, that if I fall deeply in love with someone, the need for distance and space diminishes somewhat. I'll still need my "me time", but because of the attraction and love, I willingly welcome more together time doing schtuff.

I've been in relationships where I do not really love the person or I have fallen out of love or I'm just not that into him, and under those circumstances, I have initiated seeing each other only once a fortnight... or less, much to the horror of the other party.

The longest relationships I have been in, both exhibit the same characteristics of neither of us being clingy, and whilst we may cohabit in the same abode, we are often doing our own thang. The Together Apart relationship remains my ideal type of relationship.

It does a couple good to spend some quality time apart from each other on a regular basis. I never want my bf hanging around when I'm shopping because men always look like miserable sods when they have to tail their wives / gf's when they are out trying on clothes. Why do women even bother to get the guys to tag along to the boutiques? These poor blokes pull faces longer than the bulldogs' / Basset Hounds and they are quite a sorry sight!

Couples who have their own social circles, and who spend time nurturing/improving themselves, eg. meditation, practising mindfulness, exercise regime, hobby clubs, etc are "power couples" - they are strong individuals in their own right, but when they come together, POW!!!... they are a force to be reckoned with, akin to when Wonder Woman strikes her bracelets and creates that WHOMP! POW! energy field!

PS. Apologies OP... I love my superheroes!

I love them too. Wonder Woman

...somewhere that is our own ''space'' regardless of where we find it. Mine is fly fishing...solitude, nature and blissful quiet! Here is an example of how that worked well for me....