Soft Handshake

Soft Handshake

    | Oct 23, 2017
cat_n_the_hatter   Couple Man 51yrs Woman 45yrs

I am curious to know what men and women think about handshakes. Do you judge the person on the basis of that first handshake? I like a firm handshake (to give and receive), not to crash other persons hand or overpower, but to show that the person is equal to me. Those first impressions last.
Mr Hatter says he's even offended when someone's handshake is soft and limp hand is offered, especially if it comes from a man. What are your thoughts? (Ms)
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
ontology

.

I agree absolutely. I also dislike handshakes for which the engagement/grip is not right; particularly when the other person is too quick to close their grip such that they take hold of your fingers. (You know the situation where you can't let go, and they don't let go?). Discussing this with a friend of mine some years ago, he said he stops the other person and makes them shake hands again properly. (He's 6'4", very confident demeanour, and not one to defer to just anyone. I think people corrected this way by him feel a little humiliated).
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
mango69er  

Couple Man 50yrs Woman 60yrs

D

I would be telling your friend to you f himself if he tried that. What a wanker he is. More to the man or woman than a handshake

- Posted from rhpmobile
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
swingalingson   Man 36yrs

Firm handshake

All the way from men and women.
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Mischeviouslad   Man 46yrs

Offended??

Why would Mr cat be offended by a handshake? There's a bit petty in my opinion and he should save offence for REAL matters.

I'm not a fan of soft handshakes, but really, you shake..... and move on to learning about the person behind the handshake through conversation.

A handshake is merely a greeting, and sure, there are some psychological projections that certain shakes can project...... but deliberately using it as a projection of personality or self worth is a false representation that will fall flat if you don't genuinely hold those traits



- Posted from rhpmobile
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post

Handies

I like a firm honest handshake, not pretentious hard just engaging, speaking of which I like to be looked in the eye.

A limp disinterested handshake and looking away evasively both leave me cold.

(Young men meeting the dad take note)
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
ontology

@MischeviousLad,




Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'

Why would Mr cat be offended by a handshake? There's a bit petty in my opinion and he should save offence for REAL matters.



I'm not a fan of soft handshakes, but really, you shake..... and move on to learning about the person behind the handshake through conversation.



A handshake is merely a greeting, and sure, there are some psychological projections that certain shakes can project...... but deliberately using it as a projection of personality or self worth is a false representation that will fall flat if you don't genuinely hold those traits





- Posted from rhpmobile
As @Sailbadthesinner points out, a limp, disinterested handshake (and aversion of the eyes) does in fact tell you something of the person you are meeting, and it can be offensive when it occurs (especially when used to deliberately convey contempt for the other party).
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
cat_n_the_hatter   Couple Man 51yrs Woman 45yrs

honest handshake

He says there is something dishonest if you don't offer a warm handshake. It's like "here I am ". It is not about judging the personality but some hints of hiding things could be there. I usually look person in the eye and smile. Perhaps not all people see handshake the same way as me. I do know some see it as a power relations and often try to place their hand on top...or accompany it with patronising patting on the shoulder. I wonder if men judge other men more on the basis of their handshakes?(Ms)
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
ginandfrolic  

Couple Man 34yrs Woman 25yrs

I don't object to not shaking

I find situations more enjoyable when social "norms" and formalities are not required or looked down upon.

Handshaking at times can be a rather awkward experience and I don't see the need for it in everyday interactions.

Just being nicer helpful people would make more of a difference in the world than sharing the last thing you touched with everyone

- Posted from rhpmobile
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
AnnieWhichway   TV/CD 54yrs

Prefer

A soft handshake when meeting than a soft dick when a little further engaged........


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countrytouch   Man 35yrs

...

All the options to a handshake... Too firm or not firm enough, too fast or too slow, taking the right position, checking on your body language, getting your character judged in about two seconds on first impression, no second chances...

Sounds like dating... :(

- Posted from rhpmobile
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countrytouch   Man 35yrs

...

Sailbad... Duly noted, be careful what you wish for lol ;)

To all... now thinking I might just go for the old practical joke favourite being the electric shock handshake :p

- Posted from rhpmobile
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
I_touch_myself2   Woman 53yrs

hate handshakes

You know how some aren't huggers? Well I'm like that with handshakes, makes me really uncomfortable to have a stranger force their hand at me, forcing our hands to touch. I feel my personal space is invaded, hate it. Reminds me of soneone shoving their baby at you to hold lol isn't she cute, do you wanna have a hold? Yeah nah 😂

So to answer your question, none of the above, no handshake will do me
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I_touch_myself2   Woman 53yrs

worse

worse when they say their name as they go to shake your hand, very awkward. I declined to give my name when this last happened and he looked miffed pfft
Oct 23, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Koolgrey   Man 43yrs

Despite that...

...we'd all like a firm, confident handshake offered to us...I think that reading too much into another's efforts is projecting yourself onto them.
Better to take a hand with good intentions assumed.
Some people really are soft and weak. But still good people.
Oct 24, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
cat_n_the_hatter   Couple Man 51yrs Woman 45yrs

I agree

with most of you. We can not judge character just on the basis of a handshake, but those people with soft handshakes are often seen as weak, and are exploited by others. Don't you think?(Ms)


Oct 24, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
cat_n_the_hatter   Couple Man 51yrs Woman 45yrs

Ontology

That is exactly what Mr Hatter is saying.
But he says some people are doing that unintentionally and that is even more weird! It's because they are unsure how to behave..
Oct 24, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
I_touch_myself2   Woman 53yrs

men

I'd keep the hand shaking with men, not women. It's old fashioned and awkward. Just say hello, no handshake required

You know the problem I have with it is on the one hand (pun not intended) it's old fashioned overly formal, yet profoundly/overly personal with hands touching. Definitely never shake a woman's hand regardless of workplace or personal
Oct 24, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
ontology

@cat_n_the_hatter (and others),

I agree some people are socially awkward, and that perhaps sometimes too much may be read into a poor handshake. However having said that, I think most all would agree a begrudging and/or contemptuous handshake will seldom be mistaken when it it occurs.

For the record, I'll admit I feel awkward shaking hands with women, but do so when a hand is offered (albeit more gently than my normal handshake with men). I'm not very big on hugging either; particularly with men, but also with women whom I don't know very well. I've never been very forward/overt with people in that respect.
Oct 24, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
S_OnTheLoose  

Man 38yrs

.

I hate a limp fish handshake, they're awful - though The Crusher handshake is a special sort of tosspot.

The limp fish says less about the character than a crusher, but they just feel awful - a limp handshake is about as engaging as a limp dick when it's a cold "small dick day", even if it's your own you don't really want to do much with it.



Oct 25, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
MissRedFox   Woman 42yrs

I like a firm handshake

And have developed this habit of shaking hands with people regardless of where I meet them.
But I like to see people return it confidently - particularly men.

However my new thing of wearing a large fox ring on my right hand has resulted now in a number of times with a bit of pain after a firm handshake 😳

- Posted from rhpmobile

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