Replying to Messages

Replying to Messages

    | Mar 07, 2019
I'm puzzled at times as Society call's the swinging scene a community Hmmmm...Community... Phrased in The Oxford
Practicing common ownership,Social values and responsibilities,Sharing or having same attitudes or interests,
and yet lacking in basic common civility...
I completely agree disrespectful and derogatory remarks and unsolicited cock pics warrant nothing but blocking but I don't understand how a introductory publishable message where as the recipient it is free to answer even as a guest even for the very popular that perhaps are time poor a template is available, as a "Community" it is these actions that define the caliber of new "Citizens" arriving and the "Locals" staying..
Some express that replying No has spurred a hostile reaction but I'm certain that can be foreseen by the content's of the original message.
Sheeesh pulling up to a set of traffic light's and signaling to the window washer with a gesture of No as he make's a beeline for your car seem's to warrant more of an effort than the made to the people in our "Community"
Just a Thought



Mar 08, 2019 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Soulhunters   Couple Man 36yrs Woman 55yrs

Some people receive many messages

They have busy lives and just dont have time to answer 20 plus messages a day. We receive messages from people who havent read our profile or think we dont really know what we are looking for. I find that rude and wont answer. Sometimes a polite No rewards us with another abusive message. Its cyber dating and shouldnt make people get so uptight.
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MissRedFox   Woman 43yrs

Oh this one again
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MissRedFox   Woman 43yrs

Is anyone just as upset about applying for jobs and not getting a message back ? And I recently put in time for rental applications and nope nothing back for this either

I suppose we could address this issue or just accept the answer is no and just move on

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The_Antichrist   Man 40yrs

One thing I’ve noticed....men seem to sook more about this than what women sook about the problems that message contains....

So here’s my advice....

Get a grip, accept it and change your messaging, or the people you’re sending them to, and move forward or sit in the corner and cry.....

Choice is yours really
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The_Antichrist   Man 40yrs

Just another little observation....

Sing your logic, your profile name is just as cringeworthy as an opening message, so I’m not really that surprised you’ve written this thread...
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The_Antichrist   Man 40yrs

Using*
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Qefenta4  

Woman 100yrs

Messages

I actually don't want any messages,The last three messages O revived were full of abuse.

A community can comprise people who have a common interest it can also comprise people who have conflicting or competing interests

I know a man who lathes the fact that the local library has sessions for mums and toddlers.

He mourns the days of shushing :)

I am a fairly friendly person and will say hello to most people as they walk past me.Some people don't bother to respond,that is their choice.BUT I certainly don't spend the rest of my day fretting about it.

OP I noticed that you have this same ..er..castigation on your profile.Castigaing the people you are trying to attract may well be a little counter productive.

Good luck.

Hugs Q
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Xenaesque

Yep, sadly no one here male, female or couple is entitled to anything and if you think you are you’ll be disappointed.

People choose who to reply to based on compatibility and interest and it’s their right to choose not to reply if you don’t meet criteria they are looking for.
Would it be nice to get a polite thanks but no thanks to every message where the other profile chooses you don’t meet what they are looking for? Sure of course it would be. But would you also not rather be focussing on people of interest as opposed to those that aren’t?

We try to reply to every message but we have lives and families and sometimes it just doesn’t work out that we can reply to every message. It doesn’t mean we are rude or ignorant nor do I think that of those who don’t reply to us.

Deal with it move on and if you want more help this topic has been covered more than once - do a search and you’ll find plenty of threads for you to read.
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Freaky_Fun   Woman 49yrs

Gawd again 🙄

I for one am done at replying after the last few days. I put up a travel date and men must think just because they live in a different State they can say what the fuck they want.


I have always replied with a decent no thanks message but not anymore. I'm done.


The last couple of days of abusive, sooky what's wrong with me retorts has done my head in. So you can thank your fellow mankind for people not replying.


I've had couples and women not reply either, l don't get my knickers in a knot over it. Fuck me 🙄





3 things in life are certain Death, Taxes and men whinging about no replies on the forums.
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ihere

Contact me haha
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boobs_or_busted   Couple Man 52yrs Woman 44yrs

7
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FatFunFiesty  

Woman 39yrs

MrB..... what's up with the random numbers?🤔😊
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Gr8distraction   Man 46yrs

Yep

Starting to miss the dogging threads now.
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GetMePlease   Woman 48yrs

A 'community' only suggests we have a shared interest. 'Connectedness' on the other hand is about the number and strength of connections a person has within that 'community'.

In my organisation there are many people. We identify as a community because we all work for the same organisation. I have connections with many, which means I can say 'G'day' to a lot of people around the place which feels good. I could not imagine for a second saying 'G'day' to every single person with an ID badge on just because we all work under the same roof. It's just not how humans work.

I have never blocked a soul on this site. I will never answer every message I receive because I don't want to or have to. I spend my time building quality connections with people that I like and that like me too.

That's it and all there is to it from my point of view.
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sweetnsensual   Couple Man 47yrs Woman 45yrs

We have had the experience of replying saying thanks for the message and hope they have fun here to be met with continued messages unwarranted.
Sometimes being polite can be taken the wrong way.
Sometimes no reply is an answer in itself
We try and reply to all messages but sometimes that can backfire.
If it is a community then it will reflect other community values and behaviour.
Don’t take things personally
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NewVicCpl  

Couple Man 46yrs Woman 46yrs

Thank God someone has had the courage to raise this topic, oh wait.......
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Replying to messages

Well observed...maybe just not actually Read....( Note to self consider changing profile name on advice received from The Antichrist.) That one was gold
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FatFunFiesty  

Woman 39yrs

Fair crack of the whip here OP. I'm also pretty over replying politely when the man or couple is clearly not what I'm seeking and then get absolutely abused for it. If its not abuse its the pathetic "oh woe is me, what's wrong with me... blah blah blah". THEN you feel obliged to continue the polite exchange to avoid undue upset or adding to some sadsacks already clearly miserable experience of RHP.

I DO ALWAYS reply but I'm at the precipice of not giving a rats about it anymore.

My 2cs✌
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Auflaurer

As a sender of a message, a subsequent "no thanks" reply vs no reply at all has the same outcome. By default, the sender received a "no" response either directly or passively.

As a recipient of a message, a "no thanks" reply is still directly engaging with the message sender, and has numerous variables in outcome. Many of which are exceptionally negative. No reply by contrast has a significantly lower negative outcome risk.

As a participant in either of these roles- message sender or recipient, there is no more obligation to reply to a message as there was to send a message in the first place.

With this in mind, instead of comparing messages and responces, compare receiving no response to not receiving messages. Lack of replies to messages and lack of receiving messages correlate to unengaging profiles &/or an unappealing online presence.

The wording, the stats, the photos, the quality of messages (if sent) and ironically the topics posted on forums are confounding factors which affect engagement between members. More importantly they're variables you have control over and can modify. The behaviour of other members, is not.


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The_Envoy   Man 55yrs

The positive

Being a single male on these sites will teach you patience, respect and enable composure if you allow it.

Showing frustration and anger to the non replies, being abusive to the "not interested" replies, shows to everyone that you are of not the right headspace to be considered for sex. Desperation comes to the fore.

Be calm and courteous, take it in your stride. You will find inner piece and great sex

Envoy

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