Need a straight answer......FFS, just let me know!

Need a straight answer......FFS, just let me know!

    | Apr 25, 2018
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs




This is my first and probably only post that I'll write. But I just want to know the real answer.

If the truth is that I'm as ugly as a hatful of assholes, please just tell me because these adult dating sites are making me feel a bit down.


Why is it that I get into a chat with someone, or a couple, I tell them very early on in the chat about myself. IF they say no thanks at that point...all sweet. But I've had enough of those who engage in a solid chat with me, they give me their phone number unasked , even organise a place to meet, but then end it at the exchange of pics or meeting in person.


I regard myself as being quite healthy, I go to the gym 3-4 days a week. I don't smoke, do drugs, or drink excessively. I am always conscious about being polite and respectful and I take thought when communicating with messages.


BUT I am now getting to the stage where my confidence is shot. To those who I'm chatting/ or to who I've exchanged messages with who have clearly established that they don't want to meet....this is not a post designed to criticise your choice not to meet. But to those who have simply stopped messaging, blocked me suddenly, or simply wrote "no thanks" after a pic swap....can you please tell me the real reason why you stopped contact with me. I just need to know because if its something I can improve myself from knowing then I will.




Thanks

Apr 25, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
cavey50   Man 58yrs

how long is a piece of string?




I don't know, nor can I see what you look like, BUT...

it is generally NOT the issue..

EXCEPT if you look like me...

there is a very distinct (Albeit, small) group of ladies who find me attractive enough to want to bed me..

Therefore, I have little luck on dating sites.

But, if I go to a hotel on a Friday night.. and just chill out.. have a nice time.. behave, all that shit, there is a FAR greater chance that I will score.

So.. It is PROBABLY because the piss is working on the lass involved... she missed out on the fellas she had her eye on.. (Her girlfriends got them) so, she is still itchy for a scruff...

I am available.. so she takes me home.. I know enough to NOT hang around once she has had her jollies, because she will FUCKING regret it.

there are a LOT more males then females on dating sites.. so you have an uphill push to start with..

Mate; don't take it personally...

otherwise you WILL get depressed...


Hang in there.. be logical about your approaches

and good luck..


Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
DynamicCouple36  

Couple Man 48yrs Woman 39yrs

Hard to tell without more information

You asked
“ But I just want to know the real answer. If the truth is that I'm as ugly as a hatful of assholes, please just tell me because these adult dating sites are making me feel a bit down ?”

As you have no photos on your profile (certainly not in the public gallery) it is impossible to answer your question.

For many, on these sites, this is just a fantasy. They have no intention of meeting, or taking things to the next level. Many are not who they say they are. Many couples are just a guy posing as such. There are also many “females” who end up being guys.

It is what it is, unfortunately. And it is very easy to say “no thanks” and or simply block someone. It is after all just cyberspace and the anonymity offered by it.

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
wanttojoinus

I can’t see any of your pics as they are private

But one thing I suspect is there are a lot of fake profiles on RHP, and also a lot of people that seem fine to chat but that seems to be their only intention and once it gets to meeting they ghost you. I had a quick look through your written profile and thought it looked great and I can’t see there being an issue with your physical qualities listed on there either.

I also think everyone’s opinion of what’s attractive in a potential partner varies so much, so don’t take it personally. I’ve heard it’s hard going on RHP for guys because there’s so many so it’s likely most women are talking to several different people. Hopefully you will have more luck in the future

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
The_Envoy   Man 54yrs

Straight answer?

Perhaps it's because the people you are interacting with find out that you are cheating on your wife?

Perhaps you have a face like a drovers dog but because you are married you aren't able to put up a pic so people can judge if there is attraction.

So really, your married situation has put you into this situation. So perhaps just settle down and just ask your wife if it's ok to put up your face pic on RHP.

She probably things your attractive, she married you.
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Xxalex   Man 37yrs

Sorry can't help

Unless you are hoping get a response only from those you have previously been chatting with. Noone else is going to be able to assist you, as you have zero picture access to the general public... Maybe starts with a non identifying image that shows your/your body without a clear head shot...
Hope you find the answers you are seeking

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
pipsqueak  

Woman 34yrs

Stop

Lying about yourself, to yourself, and then to others



There’s your answer
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Redmustang   Couple Man 44yrs Woman 40yrs

no pic upfront?

We wouldnt chat to anyone we havent seen a pic of to start with
There has to be some physical attraction for me and the fact you dont have a pic up suggest you are hiding something
Especially when your profile says Toowoomba but you say outside of Ipswich. You also have ask me on your profile about a relationship too.

We have recieved messages from guys like you before and its too hard to deal with. I betyou can only meet at lunch times every second Friday and wouldnt be free to have dinner and drinks as that would be too public?

Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs

Not accurate

I accept what you're saying but it's not accurate in the context of which I'm referring. You see, I discuss all the necessary issues relating to my life in the first few messages. To be rejected at that point due to my situation is not what gets me down. Instead, it is getting to the point of exchanging pics and/or meeting first...then getting ignored, blocked or simply told "no thanks"....no reason offered, even on a message form...or to offer a reason I'm a pooling when previously stated to be ok with, that's what is getting to me. There is a difference.

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs

I'm referring, not a pooling...what the heck happened there lol

Sorry about the weird typo last post

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Redmustang   Couple Man 44yrs Woman 40yrs

Pic up front

Maybe have a pic on your profile

That seems to be your stumbling point

You obviously can communicate

Maybe people are shallow

Honestly just put a pic on your profile and that will save a lot of heartache I am thinking
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
OkeyDoke45   Man 48yrs

A bucketful of bashed crabs...

I am not going to cast any judgement on your (apparently) married status and why you are stepping outside, that's none of my business.

As far as being facially unattractive, you are definitely going to get nowhere by not having any kind of pics on your profile, as others have reported. If you don't want to put a face pic up as your profile pic then at least something, a picture of your foot - anything.

Also, the facially unattractive (alright then, I'll call it ugly) bit need not necessarily be a deterrent. A friend of mine from many years ago was an absolute horror to go to pubs with - he was not what I would call ugly but he certainly wasn't handsome, I was better looking than him but I just couldn't compete with him when we went out. He had a natural charm and confidence that I didn't, and guess what women like probably more than anything? Charm and confidence. I would just fade into the background and shake my head.

I was an ugly kid, no two ways about it - I was actually told this quite frequently, even by teachers at school ** true **. I understand the frustration you feel at being beat with the ugly stick when you were born. Thankfully I somehow grew less ugly as the years progressed, I don't know why but I haven't been called ugly in years. It is impossible to tell whether this is also the case with you, as again there is nothing to see at all on your profile.
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs

Please note the context

I appreciate the replies I'm receiving, and they are far more in depth than I probably deserve. But the context is not really accurate with some of them.

I'm not upset about being told my pictures don't reflect what the other person is looking for, nor am I upset about my status because this is usually an immediate no and the reason is given. What annoys me is the people I chat with who are fine with my status, then don't offer any further correspondence after pic exchange AND those who offer to meet but never show up, then never contact, or even block me.

It's a bit annoying.
Wanttojoinus and mischa2750 seem to get what I'm saying. But I appreciate everyone's input. Thanks for offering to help.

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Hotstepper85   Man 32yrs

What lovely advice... :/




Quoting 'pipsqueak'

Lying about yourself, to yourself, and then to others





There’s your answer
How has the OP been 'lying' exactly?
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Lovechild17   Woman 48yrs

I suggest

Exchanging pics early on. Get it out of the way. Don't wait until you've invested an hour (or a day) in chatting and emailing someone. Who has the time? Then, if not, you can move on and you hav'nt wasted too much of your time.



LC.
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
AnnieWhichway   TV/CD 55yrs

Op

It seems you know the answer before you posted.

It's always going well until you reveal your dial. There is no attraction.

Not sure what you are wanting from us? Do you need us to stroke your ego as well as your cock?

Maybe put your face up and we can do an online poll if we would do you......
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Redmustang   Couple Man 44yrs Woman 40yrs

Charm

I agree my partner has a mate who’s face would curdle milk but he is a lovely guy and has charm and a wicked sense of humour. He can meet a girl out with no trouble. We are constantly amazed at the stunners he pulls lol.

I see him as a person not looks and if you turn on the charm you should have no trouble.

You should put a pic up for your potential partners.

I’m sure you have the gift of the gab
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs

Thanks for the cynicism, Anniewhichway. You're quite skilled at it.

😒

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
curiousnhorny05   Couple Man 36yrs Woman 38yrs

A pic would be helpful

So... I tend to not check out ppl if they don’t have a picture, it doesn’t have to be a face shot. But a discreet photo of you is a plus.
As to what is happening I can’t tell you. But here’s the thing sometimes I’m not attracted to someone and it’s just random stuff. Then I’m attracted to someone who’s not perfect but has a quality where it’s a cheeky smile or a way about them. I’ve heard it’s not easy out there for guys. The biggest turn off for me is not being honest and truthful. Some ppl I’ve talked with and you get this sense something doesn’t add up. That ends it for me. And to be honest us girls get so much attention you need to stand out and no it’s not just looks either.

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aceofclubs  

Man 40yrs

Some nice people are out there!

Firenice05 and Mischa2750, you are both getting it. 😊
I do have pics but like to show them to people with profiles that match my interest. There are many profiles with the public pic being cleavage, or a cock, or butt. I guess I could display something like that in a public pic, I didn't think it was so important. Obviously I'm wrong on that front.

Sonia simply having private pics to show not good enough?

- Posted from rhpmobile
Apr 26, 2018 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
norush66a   Woman 52yrs

Well

Like others have said hard to tell without a pic?..

Since I have put a face pic up as my profile pic it has stopped lots of msg....



If you can't have face pic up on public gallery for whatever reason put one in your private gallery and make it available as soon as you start msg. Saves so much time if other person is not attracted to you for whatever reason. I am sick of wasting time chatting to someone to see them cyber run a mile at face disclosure. Just let them see you straight up and move onto the next one op. Life's too short to waste time chatting to fakes or uninterested people.

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