M50 F38
How many people have you truly loved in your life
May 10 2019
How many true loves have you had and what effect has falling in and out of love had on your life?
I (Mr) have fallen deeply 7 times. My own reaction to just tallying that number is surprise that it is so many as most of my relationships have lasted many years. All of these women still hold a special place in my heart and I still remember them all fondly, one is still my best friend. The longest relationship was obviously the hardest to let go and recover from and it’s demise has changed me the most in both positive and negative ways. The others although hard to see go have always left me with more positives and very little negatives. I have loved some truly amazing women and feel quite blessed to have shared some of my time here on earth with them.
How about you guys?
- Posted from rhpmobile
Comments
FeistyFatty
5 years ago
Other than my parents and children.... just once, my hubby. Loved him since we were 14 years old .... even in our worst times we're still best mates.
RHP User
5 years ago
One love since we were teenagers,that kind of love doesnt seem to exist these days.
RHP User
5 years ago
None. I thought I was in love with my ex of 15 years but looking back, it was more of a being comfortable with him feeling. I never give him a thought anymore. If I loved the guy I would look back fondly on some moments, but.....no. Ive been in deep lust which was very intense, but that burned itself out after a year or so. I know couples who are still in love and its very plain to see. If it happens in my twilight years, Ill consider myself lucky. If not, then Ive still had some great relationships that I certainly dont regret.
Readyfors0mefun
5 years ago
(Mr) only one and I'll be hoping it stays at one...
RHP User
5 years ago
Softcpl
Same👍SSExplorer
5 years ago
Koko, it’s likely interesting what people classify as love. Your idea correlates with mine...the relationships I look back on fondly and genuinely care that those people have found their happiness...this is what I classify as love. I guess I could extend this to my dearest friends but my 7 count are the ones that have become lovers at some stage.
EarthQueen
5 years ago
Two
My ex, we were together for twenty eight years. Falling out of love with him was the most gruelling time for me. It smashed me to bits . I can’t be put back together again completely but that’s ok . I’m just different now with some small parts missing. I’ve been upgraded by that experience in every way. It was the worst/best thing to happen to me.
The other is my best friend. He has helped me heal and I can truly be myself with him. I love him to bits . He’s a beautiful man.
I feel lucky to have loved strongly twice.RHP User
5 years ago
Koko, I so identify with your comments I dont think or worry about ex. Ex means ex a long time was wasted and I will not waste any more. Im over 100 years old and still a sad romantic stay the course
RHP User
5 years ago
Davey
Koko was my ex lol
countrytouch82
5 years ago
One.
However, general definitions or even scientific hormonal definitions may say slightly differently.
The one I speak of was my first/only girlfriend but we were only together for six months. In that kind of time period only, what one thinks is love might be defined as other things: limerance, infatuation, romance, even lust etc. The longer lasting love is supposed to develop later.
Being someone who met most of my family and vice versa, also had dogs, had the same lifestyle interests and choices, the first to say yes to further mutual romantic dating, everything progressed as much as I'd always hoped for. Yes, I felt I fell in love and as it happened, she was first to tell me those words. "True love" or not, it's my best answer for the question above.
It took many counselling sessions to deal with the short and long term emotional changes from this situation unravelling for the reasons it did.SSExplorer
5 years ago
Some interesting responses.
I’ve always felt warmly for those that spend their lives with childhood sweethearts, it’s a sure achievement to keep connected to one person for that long as we all change over our lifetimes.
We surely don’t see this as often these days because life is completely different, we are more mobile in jobs and locations and often the demands of life will pull in different directions.
Even though I appreciate these relationships I also appreciate learning that there is no such thing as one true soul mate for each person. Sure you can make that a choice but if life leads you apart it is also a choice to say you could never find another soul mate.
Of course when I’ve lost the deepest of my lives I thought I could never replace them but as I regained myself and usually in resignation that I would move forward without love them pow I’d be hit head on by a new force and the journey of love would continue.SSExplorer
5 years ago
Countrytouch, many would think a 6 month relationship could not affect us so deeply but then even one conversation at the appropriate time can spur us on and lead to significant change in our lives.
It’s great you chose to work through your feelings properly and I hope you’ve come out the other end with a deeper understanding of yourself and are open to coming across another love in the future.RHP User
5 years ago
In what little life I have had so far one. Unfortunately it didn't end well, and it took quiet awhile before we were even on speaking terms again. It has been a little over two years since we parted ways and I still think about her near everyday.
alfwaz
5 years ago
Most just a lil bit for a lil bit n the ones that I loved too much stopped
SSExplorer
5 years ago
Siinatra, the first one is always the hardest to recover from as you think you could never possibly feel that depth of ice for anyone.
We think that loving another will cheapen the love that we have lost.
This isn’t the case. We have the capacity to share great love (and unfortunately hate) to many people at the same time. Whether it family or lovers or even the love people give to whole communities and even countries.
Mourn your lost love, learn from it, cherish it and yourself then release it and yourself to move on.RHP User
5 years ago
I seem to have conveniently erased those memories.....
RHP User
4 years ago
Twice. My first true love was passionate, all-consuming, probably borderline obsessive and naively optomistic on both our accounts. Unfortunately, we had the challenge of distance working against us.
Within this 12 month brief yet significant relationship, I found myself at a crossroads; to allow this man to turn his back on his homeland, family, established career and recreate a new life with me, or to give him up.
I chose the latter, and fell into the arms of my now husband (my other true love) of 10 years. Here I found deep friendship, safety, comfort and the man whom I knew I would marry and have a family.
Indeed, it was more of a slow-burn the second time around, and whilst I carried a lot of residual pain from my previous heartbreak and loss; over time, my shattered heart was pieced back together.
I feel so blessed to have been gifted the love of two exceptional men in my life.
They have a mutual respect for each other and the very different ways in which I have loved, and continue to love them both so entirely differently.
I think one of life's most beautiful gifts is the ability to love simultaneously and limitlessly.
I have loved hard, encountered loss and true heart ache, rediscovered myself and my inner strength, realised self-love and wouldn't change a single thing. Thank you for this question OP. I've enjoyed a few moments of some pretty deep self-reflection. 😊
86Jasindy
4 years ago
Fff readyforsomefun, those answers are beautiful. I would just love to be able to answer this so wonderful as both of you...
However, how many have I been "in love" with? That we shared the words and both believed them? 7. But, looking back, 6 of those were not actual love. Most were me loving the idea of being in love, playing "grown ups" by moving in together, dating, fighting, making up... I feel that Mr Jasindy is the only one I have truly loved. He makes me look within, I feel most comfortable and can be totally honest, warts and all.
I doubt i will ever look back and say "actually, I'm not sure the was it" 🤣 even if one day we aren't togethertmc1973
4 years ago
All of them
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