The Adonis Syndrome

The Adonis Syndrome

    | Dec 25, 2016
redhot666   Woman 52yrs
Ladies,

It appears that many of the ladies are looking for their 'Adonis' here, but how realistic are your expectations ? I have found in my experience that there are many genuine, sweet and lovely men on site that are more the complete package, with their manners, generousity of spirit and time and other attributes that are what we would appreciate more than their looks and six-packs. However, these men are pretty much always overlooked. Why ? Why are the many great guys being overlooked by the ladies on site ? When will you ever meet some of those men waiting in the wings for a lovel time with you ?
Dec 25, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Champagnesunsets

Redhot

Because when we join we are inundated with messages and it goes to our heads. Eventually we sort out the nice guys from the dickheads xx
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
S_OnTheLoose   Man 38yrs

.

I suspect you already know the answer :) because there is an abundance of choice from people actively approaching that doesn't exist in the "real world".

Anecdotal evidence suggests the situation is somewhat reversed if you're a male on vanilla dating sites and in the age range that girls approaching 30 are looking for (i.e. when they're inundated with Facebook notices of other school/uni friends getting married/engaged/pregnant).



Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Willow_1   Woman 51yrs

Redhot is this you writing?

Curious that someone else wrote this for you? It sounds more like Talls wording than the way you normally write? And it sounds like a post that a man would write. But its still a valid question. And Im sure that there are many men on here that would say the same. Where are all the real women??

But to answer the question, I believe I do find the good guys. Ive been seeing a lovely guy casually for most of this yr, and he would be the first to say he isnt an Adonis body type. I think he is gorgeous though, and its because he isso sweet and kind with a beautiful personality. He is one of the great guys.

I think most women on these sites learn to sort out the players from the nice guys fairly quickly. Some of us like to mix it up and have a little of both. We are single and are attracted to what we like. Either just a physical thing, or more for an emotional connection.
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Hotwives_Inc   Couple (FF) Woman 48yrs Woman 48yrs

Sexy is ...

Such an individual thing :) we're all here looking for what turns us on and are seeking people with those qualities. My concern is the implication of your post that an Adonis can't be the 'complete package'. I've met amazing people who are incredibly fit and Adonis types who are awesome guys. Equally I've met men who had tickets on themselves, and really had no right to, lol! A nice guy isn't a 'look' but an attitude for me. I like sexy with a hint of vulnerability, I like a sense of humour, i love a sexy smile and gorgeous eyes, I love muscly arms ... I can go on but in reality, like most people, I feast with my eyes first, then the rest follows. And yes, the 'package' must look good in those initial stages for me to want to continue ...

Personally, I've lost count how many people have told me 'I look so much better in real life' than I do on my profile. I don't do filters or anything else in my photos and I'm really not photogenic, but the reality is im not going to be everyone's ideal package and that's ok :) just like me, they're all looking for different things :)

There are some physical attributes I don't like, call me fickle, but I wouldn't go any further with someone in that case. That's the beauty of sites like this ;)

Mary xx
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
CucknShells   Woman 49yrs

Redhot

Recently the way you have written your posts has changed.

I am a hopeless speller but you know what that is who I am.

Please don't change or let someone change the way you are.

I liked reading your posts just the way they were.

Shells.
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
AnnieWhichway   TV/CD 54yrs

Agree

With Willow and Shells regarding the authorship.
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redhot666   Woman 52yrs

The Adonis Syndrome

cucknshells yes i did have help with this i just could not work out how to right what i was thinking and it so nice of you to say you like reading my posts beening on here is helping me with my reading and spelling and i hope you had a great xmas
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Mischeviouslad   Man 46yrs

Interesting

Do we have an outing of sorts?!
(Comfy chair, popcorn at the ready)

- Posted from rhpmobile
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Hank_E_Panky   Man 63yrs

Well well well.

I can't knock someone who is trying to improve themselves, much better than someone up themselves.
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Tall_n_Hard   Man 60yrs

The 'Authorship'...




is completely genuine - just provided a little help with the wording. Redhot and I are friends, and as such, assistance is available when desired - nothing untoward in this.


Tall

Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Mister_Playful  

Man 40yrs

I hope not.

I don't think it's an outing. If the intent of the op is what redhot wanted to say but just couldn't select the right words to say it then who really cares. At work I fairly often review other people's work for documents and other things like that and suggest changes that are normally accepted and used.

Redhot has said above the forums are helping her with reading and spelling, so maybe she just isn't as gifted as others regarding literacy and vocabulary... And there's no problem with that, we all have different strengths and weaknesses.

Keep posting redhot and if you need help then keep asking for it as you have done. All of the worlds best sports men and women still have coaches and we don't say that they're fake or cheating, they are just accepting the assistance of others who are offering their guidance and support.
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On_Safari   Woman 45yrs

Redhot

Just because someone is nice to you initially and not the "Adonis" you say most look for doesn't mean they aren't just some creepy old dude who's done the rounds well before you existed and was refused because of his creepy behaviour. Just sayin' ~ others advice about not being so gullible or quick to trust would do you well. Indy
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post

Lookout !

There's blood in the water.
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Koolgrey   Man 43yrs

. . . .

Ladies, I'm impressed.
Your like the Dark Knight Detectives of RHP...
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
lilyorchid   Woman 44yrs

Redhot

So nice to see you post again. Glad you decided to stay.



I think some people above are just surprised with the new narrative style of your posts of late, whixh is a huge deviation from your usual style. Getting help is good but I think suspicion sets in when a different writing style and thinking is presented that is different from you. It brings to question how much of the thought is yours. It's like getting somebody to write your profile using their words and thoughts rather than yours. I believe it is born out of concern for you rather than the nasty negative implications q couple has posted above. But glad you have explained and all great that posting here helps you with some help from friends. Moving on.....



On topic....



I look at the whole package when I get contacts from men. I do get plenty of contact from Mr. Six-pack and Mr. Big-dongs but that is all there is sometimes. And it gets boring and tiring very quickly as they become one dimensional. I like interesting men as I seek fwbs. A physical attraction, this varies from one person to another, is also very important, part of the facet of a person.



I'm not shallow. at times at meet and greets here and interstate, I would rather chat to more interesting mature or 'dinstinctive' men that emote warmth, smarts and humour than shallow Adonis who have nothing to say. it is out of genuine interest to me to chat to them. They know who they are when they read this. 😉
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Meander   Woman 44yrs

Well Red/Tall

I can't speak for other women, but I'm not after hot guys with six-packs and I want that whole package. Wrinkles and dad bods welcome!

Something I have noticed though is that when some guys get knocked back they blame it on women being superficial and wanting a 20 year-old stud, rather than wondering if it was their own behaviour that was the turn-off.

Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
lilyorchid   Woman 44yrs

Good point Summer

Sometimes, for both men and women, to reflect and be introspective would enable oneself to change the course of the current flow of negativity one may be experiencing. We have it in real life like in business reviews, school report s, peer group reviews, customer feedbacks, etc. Changing the mix and adapting after learning is something people can do for themselves. That just takes out the blame on one or the other when behaviours are assessed from an objective manner.



At the same token, we are not for everyone, so pick your battle and move on. There are plenty more fish in the Pie Ocean. ☺
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Hank_E_Panky   Man 63yrs

Regardless....

Regardless of who or what Sixy used for spell and grammar checker it's disrespectful, in my view, to not accept the post as hers.
Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
deepestpurple   Man 35yrs

Because the two aren't exclusive

It isn't a choice between fit/healthy and nice/genuine/interesting. There is the same chance that the fit healthy guy with a good body is nice/genuine and interesting as the others. In fact when you consider that the outward appearance of a person does in some way reflect their inner mental state you could argue that the fit/healthy guys probably are more well rounded emotionally/mentally as well.

That's the reason extreme bodybuilders, even fitness freaks, can be a turn off because it signals some form of mental unbalance.

Also, considering the cliche that this is a sex sight; I can tell you the number of times I can have sex/cum in a day is directly proportional to how intensely I have exercised in the last week then you can start to understand the attraction of the fitter guy to these women.

So, in a situation of abundance of choice you can see why the fitter guy has a lot more success on here.



Dec 26, 2016 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Qefenta1

Hmmm

Sorry Red but your OP does seem to be something that a man would say and has been a complaint of Tall's in the past.

Women have preferences and choices here,are they looking for an Adonis ? Maybe if looks are all they are interested in but if they are looking for more then looks are only part of the package.In fact many women are intimidated by very good looking men for all sorts of reasons.

Most women just want to meet a man who is genuinely interested in them.Simple really. Q

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