Kinky Not Easy

Kinky Not Easy

    | Jan 11, 2017
LaFemmeFontaine   Woman 41yrs
I'm raging, finding it difficult to hold my tongue and silence my fingers. I'm seriously pissed so please forgive me, I'm about to vent. I have received a number of messages overnight & a few texts, all of which offered, what they percieved to be sexual pleasure. I supposed, in some warped reality, I should be flattered by this.

I am not.

Why should my fetish negate manners and socail grace? What happened to the intricate dance between us that somehow relegated manners and decorum unnecessary? Am I the only person who still believes that an introduction is an invitation? It is an offer to partake in something or in someone.

I am sharp, I am insightful and I have a high emotional IQ. Just because I am not a sexually dominant woman, does not mean I am a mindless ragdoll.

In all of these emails, all that was mentioned is what they wanted to do TO me.

"I'm going to fuck your ass until I blow."
"You're going to choke on my cock till I come down your throat."
"I want to dump my load all over your pretty face."
"You cunt slut, I wan to rape your ass."

Well excuse me, but might I have your name first?

What the fuck happened to enticing me to WANT yoi? What happened to the magic of desire, anticipation, to a god damn introduction?

I am a deviant to be sure, I like my sex a little (ok a lot) left of center - that does not make me cheap nor does it make me easy. It makes me fucking selective! If I am to truly engage, to lose all inhibitions, to allow a dominant access to my body, more importantly to relinquish control of my mind, allow him to consume me - he had better be WORTH it.

People bang on about trust within the D/s dynamic - but what's that really all about?

If I do not see something in a man that will make me grow, if I do not look up to him, admire him...no, I need to go deeper. I will not fuck a person that I don't want to be. It is that simple. Best me or get out of my way! There is always an exchange of energies and I have ignorantly accepted much bullshit into my life because of my kink. The trade off, my soft heart for release. I'm sure I am not the first woman on earth who made the mistake of confusing love for mind blowingly great sex. I know I am not the first submissive to emotionally break beneath the weight of a psychopathic dominant. They are far more common place than the compassionate, awakened alpha I seek.

I'm kinky as fuck and I have no unressolved issues that tag along with that. I just like what I like. I do take offense to the common belief that I am easy, that no effort is required to capture my attention. I take offense to reading the same email eight different ways from mwn who completely miss the whole fucking point.

Surrender is EARNED and believe me, mine is fucking WORTH it. I am an ALPHA submissive. That means that you have met your match. I'm a rare breed and I am exceptionally proud of this aspect of my nature & sexuality. I earnes it! My submission and surrender is an act of will, I am not acting out unressolved bullshit.

IF I AM ON MY KNEES IT IS BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO BE THERE. It means you are WANTED, it means you are being ADORED in that moment beacuase that is what gets me off and there is no greater respect I can offer than to meet your gaze from my knees.

My surrender, no, my time and interest will require a hell of a lot more than,

I require a hell of a lot more than single sentence texts, monosyllabic answers. No I am not a quick fuck or a fuck buddy. If you want me, it is going to require more than, "Hey Babe, you wanna fuck?"

You needn't wear a suit to be sophisticated, you don't need position in order to have authority. You DO need decorum, manners and the ability to master YOUR OWN DAMN SELF before you even contemplate putting yourself in my presence.

If the D/s dynamic is what you want, you need to be more than me, or stop wasting my time.

- Posted from rhpmobile
Jan 11, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Koolgrey   Man 42yrs

Nothing new to see here

Sounds like your suitors watch plenty of porn and take their cues from that..
Jan 11, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
LaFemmeFontaine   Woman 41yrs

My head caves in..

...the boredom.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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countrytouch  

Man 34yrs

Agreed with Kool

I don't think the messages you received are anything new, for many women here, unfortunately. Most are probably not enlightened enough to comprehend the particulars of your above response, and/or don't care anyway. For those that are, you are probably only preaching to the converted, however I'm sure a small few are up for the challenge of change.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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KillerHeelz  

Woman 41yrs

I feel for you LFF...

While I am not a sub or a dom, my understanding is that the sub holds the power in the relationship when they submit. It is a gift they bestow on the dom.

The messages you have received show that these idiots have not a clue. They have no idea how to approach a woman without being rude, crude and vulgar. They have even less understanding of your fetish.

I have received so many unwanted explicit messages from men and I have relatively mainstream sexual interests. I have even received one first contact message that I can only describe as 'face rape'. First contact!!

It saddens me that they think that they can hide behind a keyboard and say vile things in an effort to fulfil some sick desire within themselves. Do as I do, if you receive messages like those you received overnight, report them to the site moderators as they are violent, bullying and completely unsolicited. I have done so for several and received replies that the issue has been dealt with. One RHP guest was removed from the site. The others were warned.

Men outnumber women significantly here. If RHP wants women to stay on their site, they will have to deal with bad online behaviour from men. We have to feel safe and comfortable otherwise we will just up and leave. As women we also have a responsibility to report these dregs of society and hopefully educate them that it is not ok to talk to women this way.

I hope you receive some more sophisticated and refined messages soon.

TWT xx
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I_touch_myself2   Woman 53yrs

yep

I feel your pain sister 😉 I'm exactly the same and they just don't get it. A few select ones do and they get the whole amazing experience, but most men just don't get it, sadly. And I'm a kink sub too, releasing full control to them, mind and body, but rarely find those who are worthy. I could give you one classic example of something that happened, but I can't, he'd know I was talking about him, but zero interest in my pleasure, all about what he wanted me to do, wear, blah blah but not once did he ask what I wanted, not remotely interested. Agree with the above, too much porn, not enough real human intimacy to understand the 2 things can meld together if they GIVE and not just want to take. Shit, listen to me, bit of a vent there 😀 fuck them, about time they got with the bloody programme, this is the 20th century is it not? The neanderthals are still amongst us 😏
Jan 12, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Lovinit28andKC72   Couple Man 44yrs Woman 48yrs

i will get back to you

I have to get really for work and don't have the time to pen a response right this minute. 💋
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Hotwives_Inc  

Couple (FF) Woman 48yrs Woman 48yrs

domnant vs dickhead ....

A true dominant would explore with a sub to discover the beauty in the sub's surrender. It is through the exchange of trust that the D/s relationship is further developed. A true Dom knows things about you that maybe you don't even recognise yet, they would know your limits and how to help you grow within those. And a true dominant (male or female) would not look at their sexual gratification first but through the exchange of trust discover hidden desires. A dominant watches what the the sub's body is saying and the words associated with the sub's every action. A true dominant doesn't presuppose knowing the sub but provides opportunities for discovery.



For a lot of guys, they confuse domination with abuse. Don't get me wrong, I love the sex some of these guys describe in the messages they are sending you, but to get me there, a man would've had to earn my trust and respect to know what my boundaries are and to ensure the whole experience was truly sexual and erotic for me and not leave me an empty shell which has been abused ...



I do argue that the art of seduction is lost on many people ...I go to great lengths to set 'the mood', to seduce, to entice, depending on what I know of a person, their likes and dislikes, their fantasies .... but that happens through open and insightful conversations first, then observing them and discovering more .... it's this that is lost in my opinion.

Mary xx



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Mischeviouslad  

Man 45yrs

They're doing you a favour

Sounds like this must be your first ride on the internet rodeo

Welcome to the world of virtual reality where anonymity from behind a monitor affords these types the bravery to allow their inner dipshit to become their outer dipshit.

It possibly gives you an insight into their woeful life in the real world which has seen them emerge in here, as the pathetic sexpest that delivers them such a woeful life.

And because they don't get it, in here, they don't get any.... you know the types... the ones who take rejection of their horrible methods poorly and go on to abuse you by saying they wouldn't fuck you anyway, or that they pick up 20yos all the time and that it's your loss because they're rich and other broken male ego bullshit.

And they keep on doing it even in the face of their overwhelming failures.

So... while it's unfortunate that you have to endure such stupidity, they've done you a favour by being so up front about their dipshittery and quickened their journey to the land of Block.

They're out there.... sadly.... but at least you can keep them out.... and not invite them in.

DG

- Posted from rhpmobile
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SoftandCurious   Woman 38yrs

Regardless

Of whether you have a kink, are a sub or just consider yourself an explorer - those messages unfortunately are quite common on here.

Clearly they haven't read your profile properly as you state "you are well skilled in the lost art of seduction." My reaction when I receive those messages is either to ignore or point out that I'm not a piece of meat.

Think of it another way - they've made their lack of understanding known and saved you some time. The encounters you want require a great deal of understanding and trust.

Completely agree with everything Mary said on this. And these men clearly don't fit the role.
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AnnieWhichway   TV/CD 54yrs

The senders

Of those messages would rarely turn up to meet. Theefore manners and introductions are not required.

They are releasing some sort of frustration that are in their personal lives. If they actually got a positive responce there would be silence on line.

They see a profile that they see is kinky. They think I'll get my man pants on and prove to themselves that they can be the big Dom.

Then their partner yells out from the other room to "get the fuck down here and do these dishes "

"Coming dear.... " and closes the rhp screen.....
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blissful_45   Woman 45yrs

Agree

I agree with all of the comments here so far.



There are some who think they can just say what they want to you and then there are those gems who can give you what you want with respect.



Like Kool and Country said it's not uncommon I've had many like that myself and have changed my profile because of it. At the end of the day if you know who you are and what you want fuck them. I know that probably doesn't help much when you receive such disrespectful messages but venting always helps me :).





Block and delete or let them have it!



Xx
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Eiliethiya   Woman 39yrs

You write

All of your recent posts, feel like the words in MY head! I'm just not as articulate as your awesome self! ;)

Unfortunately, being open about your likes/dislikes, kinks and/or fetishes will always invite the crass and crude messages from guys assuming you're not an actual woman...just a willing vagina.

I suck at quoting...but your following statement is EXACTLY how I feel!

"I just like what I like. I do take offense to the common belief that I am easy, that no effort is required to capture my attention. I take offense to reading the same email eight different ways from men who completely miss the whole fucking point."

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Stirry   Man 37yrs

Well.....

I hope you feel better.....as those that are probably sending those messages won't read it or learn from it....

I'm sorry you've experienced this.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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TJandDJ  

Couple Man 49yrs Woman 47yrs

Dodged a bullet

They don't qualify for the criteria you have chosen.
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Qefenta1  

Woman 63yrs

Lafontaine

Many women here receive those sort of messages...unfortunately..The content is abusive,they are abusers ,weak mined and not worth a second thought. In fact they probably haven't even read your profile,it's really not about you ,it's about them.Q
Jan 12, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post

Fools

Clearly those men were idiots. Your profile should have scared them off with the well articulated prose. Some men will get lazy, especially if they have messaged and been rejected quite a few times, and simply send a fumbled overly direct sexual response. I well written seductive introduction is much harder to write - especially to a stranger.




I will however, state the obvious about the third response you listed. The idea that 'rape' is an appropriate act is disgusting and offensive. You may have dodged a bullet there.

Take care.
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FlyGirlC   Woman 36yrs

To be honest

Beautiful, reading your profile even got me hot and horny! But first and foremost, you want an honest and respectful guy!
Defamatory and vulgar messages will only result in blockage.

What do you want at the initial meeting before delving into too much detail of your fantasies? Timewasters don't intend on meeting and know they don't have a chance. Maybe use your best and worst experiences as a general guide for an update? Change your approach to change your result?

Like most have said above, they are trying to be what they think you want and just outright selfish. They try to be dirty and it ends up being disgusting. I honestly haven't received any messages like that - call me naive, but I was pretty shocked. Timewasters.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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Summer_in_Sydney   Woman 44yrs

Fontaine,

I agree with Q, most if not all women (as well as TV and TG members) get these messages, no matter what their profile says.

If they mention profanity I report the user, then block them.



As for text messages: I only give out my number once I'm quite sure someone is respectful and polite.
Jan 12, 2017 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
CandyDelicious   Woman 30yrs

Your gangbang question.

It could because of your gangbang question and a man's understanding of what gang girl likes. Just a thought
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hornypair0079  

Couple Man 51yrs Woman 51yrs

Not goodie.

Try blocking the dick heads

- Posted from rhpmobile

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